Sarah Palin Is An Idiot

This is sure to piss off the TeaBaggers among my readership, but I cannot... WILL not remain silent on this.

The Republican "juggernaut" known as Sarah Palin is a complete and total idiot.

The only reason that this waste of human flesh is still in the spotlight is twofold:

1. She is pretty fucking hot. I personally would do her as long as she kept her mouth shut and didn't try to spend the night. Other than as an animatronic sex toy however, she has no redeeming value.

2. She is a seemingly endless font of completely inaccurate and ludicrous quotes, which keeps bloggers like myself in business.

That being said, here begins today's rant...

John McCain’s top campaign strategist said in a recent interview that Sarah Palin was dishonest as the GOP’s vice-presidential nominee and that her untruths have done long-term damage to her public image.

“There were numerous instances that she said things that were — that were not accurate that ultimately, the campaign had to deal with,” said Steve Schmidt in an interview broadcast on CBS’s “60 Minutes.” “And that opened the door to criticism that she was being untruthful and inaccurate. And I think that is something that continues to this day.”

Schmidt cited an ethics report on the then-Alaska governor from her home state on an investigation into whether she had improperly used her government position.

“She went out and said, you know, ‘This report completely exonerates me,’” Schmidt said. “And in fact, it — it didn’t. You know it’s the equivalent of saying down is up and up is down. It was provably, demonstrably untrue.”

While the GOP strategist has previously criticized Palin, he has never before leveled such a sharp critique of her integrity — and certainly not on a national television.

Schmidt’s withering depiction of Palin was aired in a “60 Minutes” segment devoted to the release of a long-anticipated book on the epic 2008 campaign, “Game Change.”

The book’s authors, journalists Mark Halperin and John Heilemann, also appeared on the show and recounted the days leading up to Palin’s shocking selection.

With Democrat-turned-Independent Sen. Joe Lieberman seen as untenable for the conservative Republican base, McCain’s aides were desperate for a similarly outside-the-box pick.

So, recalling McCain’s urgent need to shake up a race he appeared likely to lose, Halperin said the Arizona senator wound up with a last-minute selection of a “virtual stranger.”

Her debut speech at the GOP’s convention won wide acclaim, but immediately afterward it was clear to McCain’s aides that she had significant deficiencies.

Heilemann said that even after crash-course tutorials by campaign aides following the convention, Palin was still woefully uninformed about basic policy issues.

“She still didn’t really understand why there was a North Korea and a South Korea,” Heilemann told the program’s Anderson Cooper. “She was still regularly saying that Saddam Hussein had been behind 9/11.”

Schmidt said Palin was ignorant about many matters of national security policy, but allowed that any of the vice-presidential candidates tapped would have needed tutoring on such issues.

But he said she hurt herself in the now-infamous interview with CBS’s Katie Couric by not adequately preparing and letting herself be distracted by what the authors describe as an obsession about her political standing in Alaska.

Even on the morning of the Couric interview, Schmidt said Palin was focused on a candidate questionnaire from the small newspaper that circulates in her Wasilla, Alaska hometown.

Schmidt declined to say whether he would again urge McCain to tap Palin but said that she ended up helping more than hurting.

“I believe, had she not been on the ticket, our margin of defeat would’ve been greater than it would’ve been otherwise,” he said.

A Palin spokesperson declined to comment on the new book, instead touting the former governor’s own insider campaign account, “Going Rogue.”

Using Sarah Palin's defense of Rush Limbaugh against her, Stephen Colbert proudly pronounced that "Sarah Palin is a fucking retard."

After mocking Palin's speech at the Tea Party Convention (taking the obligatory jabs at the notes on her hand) Colbert moved on to Palin's reaction to Rahm Emanuel's use of the word "retard." Palin not only called for his Emanuel's firing, but also defended Rush Limbaugh's use of the word, deeming it acceptable because it was satire.

After playing the clip of Limbaugh's "subtle" satire, Colbert jumped on the opportunity that his own satirical show presented. An opportunity to call Palin a "fucking retard." Colbert added that her reasoning also explained the note on her other hand: "Retard = sometimes funny."

Finally, I don't think I need to remind my more intelligent readers that Mrs. Palin is quite simply not capable of opening her mouth and not having something unintentionally hilarious come out. I offer these examples:

1. “As Putin rears his head and comes into the air space of the United States of America, where– where do they go? It’s Alaska. It’s just right over the border.” –Sarah Palin, explaining why Alaska’s proximity to Russia gives her foreign policy experience, interview with CBS’s Katie Couric, Sept. 24, 2008.

2. “We believe that the best of America is not all in Washington, D.C. … We believe that the best of America is in these small towns that we get to visit, and in these wonderful little pockets of what I call the real America, being here with all of you hard working very patriotic, um, very, um, pro-America areas of this great nation.” –Sarah Palin, speaking at a fundraiser in Greensoboro, N.C., Oct. 16, 2008

3. “Well, let’s see. There’s — of course — in the great history of America rulings there have been rulings.” –Sarah Palin, unable to name a Supreme Court decision she disagreed with other than Roe vs. Wade, interview with Katie Couric, CBS News, Oct. 1, 2008.

4. “All of ‘em, any of ‘em that have been in front of me over all these years.” –Sarah Palin, unable to name a single newspaper or magazine she reads, interview with Katie Couric, CBS News, Oct. 1, 2008.

5. “They are also building schools for the Afghan children so that there is hope and opportunity in our neighboring country of Afghanistan.” –Sarah Palin, speaking at a fundraiser in San Francisco, Oct. 5, 2008.

6. “Pray for our military men and women who are striving to do what is right. Also, for this country, that our leaders, our national leaders, are sending soldiers out on a task that is from God. That’s what we have to make sure that we’re praying for, that there is a plan and that that plan is God’s plan.” –Sarah Pailn, on the Iraq war, speaking to students at the Wasilla Assembly of God, June 2008.

7. “As for that VP talk all the time, I’ll tell you, I still can’t answer that question until somebody answers for me what is it exactly that the VP does every day?” –Sarah Palin, interview with CNBC’s “Kudlow & Co,” July 31, 2008.

8. “They’re in charge of the U.S. Senate so if they want to they can really get in there with the senators and make a lot of good policy changes that will make life better for Brandon and his family and his classroom.” –Sarah Palin, getting the vice president’s constitutional role wrong after being asked by a third grader what the vice president does, interview with NBC affiliate KUSA in Colorado, Oct. 21, 2008.

9. “I told the Congress, ‘Thanks, but no thanks,’ on that Bridge to Nowhere.” –Sarah Palin, who was for the Bridge to Nowhere before she was against it.

10. “I’m the mayor, I can do whatever I want until the courts tell me I can’t.’” –Sarah Palin, as quoted by former City Council Member Nick Carney, after he raised objections about the $50,000 she spent renovating the mayor’s office without approval of the city council.

Misplaced rests his case.

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

See you tomorrow.