Monday, December 28, 2009

The Tao Of The Lazy Hippie


Welcome back!

I had hoped to make the first post-Christmas entry something light-hearted and fun, but alas, the Grand Architect of the Universe had other plans for Misplaced today.

Unfortunately, someone back in Buffalo needs a spanking, and it's on me to do it.

I didn't want to, but sometimes inappropriate behavior cannot be ignored... especially when it hits close to home, more so when it involves someone who falls under Misplaced's cloak of protection.

Pull up a chair folks. This is some fucked up shit. We'll get to the lazy hippie after a little background.

Christmas Night, I received a telephone call from my dear friend ****** back in Buffalo. (Some names redacted to protect the privacy of the individual, others are getting called the fuck out.) After making small talk with me for a few moments, ****** informed me that she had spent part of Christmas Day in the hospital after taking a fall down her basement steps, hitting her head on the concrete, and knocking herself unconscious, resulting in seventeen stitches, and one hell of a shiner.

After my expected freakout on receiving this news, ****** informed me that she was indeed okay, was going to have a drink, then it was off to bed for some much-needed rest.

But not before she asked me the following question:

"Do you want to hear something that's going to make you very angry?"

Knowing the hospital that she had been treated at was capable of moments of unprofessional behavior, leading to complete ineptitude, I was expecting her to tell me a story of Emergency Room incompetence.

Nope.

It was a story of unprofessional behavior by a hospital staff member, but one completely uninvolved with ******'s case.

Unprofessional behavior that sadly, was directly tied to Misplaced.

Immediately following her fall, ****** was rushed to Millard Fillmore Gates Hospital by her son, and son-in-law. There she was seen and treated in the emergency room, stitched up by a doctor who is a colleague of a surgeon who is a friend of her son, and sent upstairs for a CT scan, just to make sure everything inside the skull was as it was supposed to be.

While the three of them were in the elevator on the way up to have the CT scan done another person boarded the elevator. This would be Kathy, the live-in girlfriend of Don, my former landlord, and lazy hippie I promised we would discuss.

Kathy recognized ****** and said: "Mrs. *****?"

****** looked at her and said something to the effect of "I'm sorry, I don't remember who you are..."

Kathy responded: "I'm Kathy, Don's girlfriend".

****** said: "Oh yes, I remember you."

Kathy then turned to ******'s son and said: "Do you know Jonathan?"

******'s son replied: "Yes, I know Jonathan." (Why wouldn't he? I was around their family on a regular basis going back to 2004!)

What happened next was easily the most absurd thing I have heard in many years...

Kathy then said: "Yeah, Jonathan left us with a lot of bills when he moved out..."

Now hold on just a second here...

Many of you know the circumstances in which I moved out of the house on Pennsylvania Street in Buffalo. Many of you had the opportunity to visit me there, and those of you who did know the condition it was in when I moved in, the improvements I made while I was living there, and the things I accepted as a condition of having a landlord who is a lazy hippie. I'm talking about:

1. The hole in the roof that led to black mold growing in the ceiling and walls of the third-floor bathroom, rendering it not only unusable, but also a serious threat to the health of anyone who entered it.

2. The hole in the siding just below the roof line that allowed squirrels to infiltrate the ceilings on BOTH the second and third floors... Anyone who visited will remember the scampering of little clawed feet over the kitchen and living room on the second floor, and over the Master Bedroom on the third floor.

3. The list of other minor flaws and imperfections that were NEVER addressed by the lazy hippie landlord... some as minor as a broken front door lock, and lack of a doorknob. Some as major a a baseboard heat system that needed to be bled, but never was, and the lack of an adequate fire escape.

All of that is irrelevant in light of the fact that Kathy was running her mouth about a two-year old landlord-tenant dispute that had nothing to do with the parties she was discussing it with.

More so considering that she was running her mouth to ******'s son and son-in-law who were obviously more concerned with the fact that ****** had just sustained a rather severe head injury, and really don't give a rat's ass about my dealing in my personal life.

After my head exploded, I talked with ****** for a few more moments and hung up the phone.
I sat there, furious. Not because Kathy was airing my dirty laundry to people I am very close to, but because the inappropriateness of her behavior was increased tenfold by the fact that she chose to slander me to friends of mine who quite obviously had much bigger concerns at the moment.

I calmed myself down a bit, then logged onto Facebook and sent Don The Lazy Hippie the following missive:

Jonathan K. Lee December 26 at 10:36am
I just had a most interesting conversation with ******.

First, I'm going to say that she thinks that considering the situation, what your girlfriend did yesterday at the hospital was most inappropriate.

Second, I'm going to point out that attempting to assassinate my character with friends who entrusted me with their families safety and well-being was a foolish move on her part.

Did she think that it wouldn't get back to me?

Since we're obviously going to play that game now, I am putting you on notice that you shouldn't get into a pissing contest with someone who has the ear of, and is looked upon favorably by some of those in Buffalo's old money community.

In light of my recent messages to you, I would think that you would be smarter than that.

You ... should inform Kathy that slanderous statements are frowned upon not only in the old money community, but the legal one as well.

Welcome to MY world.


















He responded:

Don ***** December 26 at 5:06pm Report
My, my, what indignance!

First of all I was not there so I only have hearsay...as do you.

Second, since when is telling the truth character assasination? I'm sure she couldn't care less if it got to you or not. I know I certainly do not. I have no reason to. I'm not a liar.

I don't understand what your messages have to do with anything. You made another of your "Hey, let's be friends and I'll straighten all of this out". We both know it bullshit Jonathan. Smarter just means I don't swallow it this time.

Oh "the offer" is off again....what a surprise, you mean I don't get my $200 with a promise of more to come? Gee.

Should be easy to prove slander. Get your crack legal team on it. I'm not the one who ran out on a debt...that was you.

I have nothing to do with "your world" nor would I want to if your attitude to friends is what you have demonstrated in your actions with me.

Have your lawyer write me a nice letter. Prick

















Of course, I wasn't going to just let that slide:

Jonathan K. Lee December 26 at 6:59pm
Indignance has nothing to do with it.

I see that you're still a condescending soul.

Of course I would expect no less from you.

The fact remains that **** was injured, in the hospital, and for some reason, your girlfriend decided that moment was an appropriate time to start running her mouth about something that had absolutely nothing to do with ******'s son, or son-in-law, who were in the elevator with her.

What the FUCK does your issue with me have to do with *****'s family?

Nothing.

But that's how you roll I guess.

It's good to see that the women in your life still think that they need to control things.

Bite me you fucking prick. Like I have anything to worry about from your weak ass anyway... Your reputation as a lazy, do-nothing is already well-known inside your circle as well as outside.

I'll buy and sell you if that's what I wish.

It may do you well to remember that, because if I decide to drop the hammer on you, you'll never see it coming. You seem to have forgotten that people with money and power care about and respect me.

No lawyers necessary.























To which he responded:

Don December 26 at 7:40pm
Really, let's make this public shall we, smartass! Let's see you are going to use your connections through ****** ***** to use "old money" to "drop the hammer on me". OK Buddy, just let me forward this to a few people...

BRB




Nineteen minutes passed, during which he forwarded my messages to him to anyone he thought would listen, then I received this:

Don ***** December 26 at 7:59pm Report
And in case you hadn't noticed, dumbass. I have not contacted you. I have no real idea of what was said and I have only given my opinion. Now, if you have a gripe with someone I suggest you deal with them.

I may have trouble with women but, aren't you a bit presumptuous to tell ME how to handle women? I mean under the circumstances.

And lazy? Gee, here I thought it was you who beat ME out of $2300 and yes, this is going public. I can't have you threatening me and keeping it secret. I have no pact with the likes of you.

And what is it exactly you are buying? Me? Good one, let me know how that works out fer ya' Chachi! Gettin' a hit doggie from the SPCA with your old money connections?
Now, let's see, if anything happens around here whom shall I say was threatening?













For some reason, he seemed to think that "going public" was going to bother me.

In fact, his "going public" has simply opened the door for me to discuss the situation here, and share it with a much larger audience than the fifteen or twenty Facebook friends he forwarded my earlier messages to.

He tried to take me to court over that situation last year, and the Judge threw out his case.

Hmm... the court threw out his case, and I won... What does that say?

I must have really struck a nerve with him, because I hadn't seen or responded to his above tirade when he sent this along nearly an hour later:

Don ***** December 26 at 8:54pm
"I'll buy and sell you if that's what I wish." How fucking high brow =:>


Misplaced can sure push some buttons, can't I?

The following morning (after all, I don't feel the need to sit on Facebook for hours like some people...) after reading his "high brow" spluttering I sent him this:

Jonathan K. Lee December 27 at 8:44am
Spread and forward whatever you wish hippie. I'm way ahead of you there.

People in your circle shouldn't be fucking with people in my circle... especially when they're in the hospital.

"Hit doggie"? That's absurd.

I do however, have a blog that gets 1500-2000 hits per week... mostly people in Buffalo. The power of the written word is all I need to deal with the likes of you and yours.

P.S. I'm glad you'll be getting your social security soon... finally you'll have a steady income that doesn't require putting down your bong and getting off your ass and WORKING.











Yeah... those of you who know him and have access to his page have seen that he is quite proud of, and announced the fact that he's only a few months away from sucking the Social Security tit... thank GOD for entitlements I guess...

To that he responded:

Don ***** December 27 at 9:17am
You pompous buffoon! "your circle"? Where was your fucking circle when it was time to pay me back you cocksucker! While I was taking care of my mother and trying to keep the gas and electric on while paying your fucking bills!!! You have no integrity at all, Jonathan. Shut the fuck up no one believes your irrational bloviating. I wonder what Ms ***** will think of you threatening me with your "connections."





"Irrational bloviating"?

The Merriam-Webster Dictionary defines "bloviate" as follows:

blo·vi·ate
Pronunciation: \ˈblō-vē-ˌāt\
Function: intransitive verb
Inflected Form(s): blo·vi·at·ed; blo·vi·at·ing

Etymology: perhaps irregular from blow
Date: circa 1879

: to speak or write verbosely and windily


Hmmm...

Misplaced may be a LOT of different things, not all of them good, but I'm guessing that most of you are chuckling at the use of the word "bloviating" to describe me.

Anyway...

I responded to his accusations of "bloviating" behavior as follows:

Jonathan K. Lee December 27 at 5:12pm
Go ahead and call her.

I see that you've forgotten about the incidents in which I gave you money for utilities right before I left for Minnesota on a trip, then you called me a few days later and told me "you didn't know if my lights were going to on when I got back"... or perhaps the fact that when I gave you money for utilities, it never seemed to get used for that purpose... or that you were all freaked out about not being able to pay your property taxes (the fact that I was behind on my rent at the time is not relevant, you and I both know you wouldn't have had the money for your taxes anyway... I'm guessing that Kathy isn't aware of that... but ***** IS. After all, when I borrowed that $1500 from her I told her exactly WHAT and WHO it was for... Feel free to tell anyone ANYTHING you want. I have nothing to hide.)

Perhaps you've also forgotten that you waited for me to put money in your hand, and then the very next day (after you had spent it, of course) you decided to tell me that you were going to have Gabe & Arizona move in, effectively ending the "gentlemen's agreement" we had at the time. You never gave me a lease, but I guess you're aware of that.

Get real you LAZY piece of shit. Everyone around you knows that you're averse to getting a job and you're looking for an angle where you can sit on your ass and collect money for doing nothing. I offered you concert work EVERY summer, and you didn't want to do it.

When you HAVE had good ideas, you haven't done anything with them, and NO ONE is more aware of that than me... NeoWorld was a great idea, you didn't do anything with it, and Linden Labs is making money hand over fist with Second Life...

If you were motivated to do more than sit around and wait for someone to tell you how great your ideas are and subsequently back a dump truck full of money up to your door, you'd be a fucking MILLIONAIRE by now, and we'd ALL be working for YOU in some capacity.

Don't blame your financial shortcomings on me.

Blame them on your lack of motivation.





























Of course, this enraged him, and the following arrived in my inbox thirty-seven minutes later:

Don ***** December 27 at 5:49pm
Are you done? Or are you going to just keep bothering me, jerkoff? You have an interesting view of reality but what does any on this have to do with me? I regard you as I do Rick Gross if that puts it in perspective for you.



Wow.

Talk about petulant. That's the most aggressive backpedaling I've ever seen... I'm amused by his descent into name-calling... Speaks volumes as to who is holding the moral high ground.

By the way, who the hell is Rick Gross? Do any of my readers know? If so, please share. I'd hate to let a perfectly good insult go to waste... I feel like I'm missing something here.

Further proving that the lazy hippie just can't get me off his mind, three minutes later the following arrived in my inbox:

Don ***** December 27 at 5:52pm
You may throw in another pointless rant if you want the last word then let's call it quits.


Well... I would have thrown in another "pointless rant", but the lazy hippie flexed his Facebook muscles, and blocked me from replying to his messages, or clicking on his link so I can send him any more messages.

I guess he took his ball and went home.

Misplaced wins.

At the end of the day, if he or his girlfriend have an issue, they should be bringing it up to me... NOT injured acquaintances and their family members in the hospital. Especially when the situation has nothing to do with them.

Word to the wise:

If you have an issue with Misplaced, you take it up with Misplaced.

When you read this hippie, (and we BOTH know you will) under stand that you don't ever fuck with the people I care about. That's a sure way to find yourself on the receiving end on my wrath. To underline that point, I'll leave you with this quote from Samuel L. Jackson's Jules Winnifield character from Pulp Fiction:

"The path of the righteous man is beset on all sides by the iniquities of the selfish and the tyranny of evil men. Blessed is he, who in the name of charity and good will, shepherds the weak through the valley of darkness, for he is truly his brother's keeper and the finder of lost children. And I will strike down upon thee with great vengeance and furious anger those who would attempt to poison and destroy my brothers. And you will know my name is the Lord when I lay my vengeance upon thee."

Food for thought you stupid, lazy hippie.

As for the rest of you? The cool ones? The ones who have nothing but love for Misplaced?

I'll see YOU tomorrow.

25 comments:

  1. nothing but love, honey...nothing but love! You make me smile and provide me with chuckles. Wish I had your chutzpa (hope that's spelled right...cause I didn't really want to use the word 'balls'---oops) TMR

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  2. Jonathan, you crack me up! Don forwarded your messages to me the other day, and I was laughing that he still is ranting and raving about that shit. You're 100% right, what his girlfriend did was totally inappropriate.

    Listen man, just let him sputter and fume. Everyone here knows what the score with him is. Motivation to work for a living has never been his strong suit, and it's ALWAYS someone else's fault that he has no money.

    Funny shit though man, I'm going to forward this to a few people!

    Peace

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  3. Dude, Don is a fucking idiot. Everyone here knows that.

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  4. I agree. Anyone who knows Don and knows Jonathan can see quite clearly what the deal here is. At least Jonathan works for a living. Don's idea of work is sitting around smoking weed and yammering on endlessly about how corrupt government is.

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  5. Oh my god! Don doesn't just go on forever about how corrupt government is, he's got a perennial hard on for that Randi Rhodes chick. If Don ever has an original thought about politics, and not something he heard on talk radio and repeats ad nauseum it will be a sign of the apocalypse.

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  6. What Don and Cathy did was immature, but Slander? Hardly. If you owe him money, and you never stated here specifically that you don't, be a man and pay up or shut up. If you did work for him then you should have come to some agreement as to the worth and taken that off the total at the time, not whine years later. You seem like the hippy here brah.

    I for one knew Don back when he had his own construction business and spent what 20 years working his ass off. How he spends his time is his business and none of your business. If anyone is guilty of slander (well I suppose it's actually libel), it's you for posting this.

    You also are making way to big a deal over Kathy taking to your friends, was it tacky and classless? Sure, but your making it out to be way bigger then it is.

    Honestly man, I always thought you were a cool guy and I enjoy reading your blog but I really have to call you out here. Man up or shut up.

    -Nick Duersch

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  7. I'll put in my two cents. Don definitely has a tendency to point the finger everywhere but at himself. The fact that he forwarded your messages to other people and "went public" is laughable. He obviously doesn't know Jonathan very well.

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  8. No offense Nick, but you're out of line here. What Kathy did was inappropriate, end of story. I called Don on it, and he came out with the "I'm going to go public with this" bullshit.

    I've got nothing to hide.

    As far as your "man up, or shut up" comment is concerned, "manning up" is EXACTLY what I'm doing here. Someone is his circle came at one of my people with some bullshit that didn't concern them at a most inappropriate time, and I take offense at that.

    Re-read everything bro... You've quite obviously taken some things here out of context. I'm trying to figure out where you got the idea that I worked for Don... I offered HIM concert work every summer going back the last three years, but he was more interested in sitting in his studio, playing at being an artist for no money.

    I'll also point out that he tried to take me to court, and got bounced.

    Moral high ground goes to me. If I lose you as a reader Nick, so be it. You've been a friend of that family for more years than I know about.

    It's cool. I know where your loyalties lie.

    Just make sure you know what you're talking about before you come at me. I wasn't the one who went public with this, Don is. It's high time he stopped blaming ME for his financial woes and took responsibility for his own shit.

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  9. Nick obviously didn't comprehend what Jonathan wrote. Don was the one who went public with this bullshit. I was just on the phone with someone Don was forwarding messages to. Don's girlfriend crossed a line she had no business crossing, and Don is acting like a four-year old with his 'I'm going to tell on you' shit.

    Grow up Don. Get a clue Nick.

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  10. You're out of line Nick.

    You will NOT come on here and try to make a case for Don. Especially since you don't know the whole story. I can tell that he's obviously whined to you about the situation, because that's the only reason you're in here trying to play Captain Save-A-Ho.

    You also need to stop trying to argue libel and slander with me... I WAS the General Manager of a law firm in Buffalo for three years. Instead of quibbling about semantics, and the gray area that the definition of both slander and libel fall under, I'll end that by putting them both under the blanket of defamation.

    Don needs to fight his own battles. You need to sty out of this Nick.

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  11. I don't think I've spoken to Don in years.

    Did you really erase my post? lol

    -Nick

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  12. Yes, I deleted your comment Nick. I've been on the phone with people from Buffalo since I published this entry, and it's been made quite clear to me that not only is your boy Don forwarding the e-mail exchange between us to anyone who will listen, but I also have been made to understand that he has also said several things about me to people that quite frankly, are not nice.

    Fact is, when I was in Buffalo, he didn't say shit. But as soon as I was out of town, he suddenly grew a set of balls. Now that I'm not there to defend myself, suddenly he's got shit to say to anyone he can corner for ten seconds.

    That shit is WEAK.

    He tried to take me to court, figuring that I wouldn't spend the money to fly back to defend myself.

    He's a backstabber and a nightfighter.

    If you're going to bring shit to me, bring it to my face, don't hide in the shadows, That's EXACTLY what he did.

    Fucking PUSSY move is what that shit is.

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  13. Answer me this honestly, do you owe him money?

    -Nick

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  14. Finally. Nick, you should've asked that question first b/4 reprimanding or calling anyone out.

    Buffalo is buzzing tonight!

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  15. Nope. It's a push.

    I actually did offer him a token payment awhile back, because I know that he's in some financial straits, and he quite obviously hasn't been honest with Kathy about the financial situation with the property he purchased.

    I can produce receipts for everything I put into that property... most of which are things that he as the landlord was supposed to take care of BEFORE a tenant moves in... In fact, if I wanted to be a complete asshole to him, the receipts I have for work done to make the upstairs habitable would show him owing ME close to $3000.

    He violated our "gentlemen's agreement" Nick. The reason he did so was simply because he wanted to put money in his pocket. I kept meticulous records. He writes shit down in pencil on the corner of his desk.

    I borrowed the money he needed for his property taxes from a friend. He didn't have to pay it back, that fell to me.

    I don't owe him a fucking thing, and I can produce paperwork that shows at the end of the day, he owes ME money.

    He's somehow forgotten that I know the financial games he plays to stay afloat... right down to kiting checks.

    My shit is solid, and I can back it up with receipts and legal paperwork.

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  16. In fact Nick, after the "I don't know if your lights are going to be on when you get back" incident, the first thing I did was change the utilities for the upstairs into MY name. The last straw for me was coughing up money for utilities and getting a phone call a few days later while I'm out of town that pretty much told me that the money didn't go for the utilities it was intended for. So I REALLY don't know where Kathy gets off telling people I "left them with a lot of bills" when the bills for the space I was occupying were in MY name.

    Unless of course she was led to believe that the utilities for the 2nd and 3rd floor were still being handled by them... but I have those receipts too...

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  17. In fact...

    We could settle this very easily.

    Since Don seems to have finally grown a set on balls, how about a winner-take-all Mixed Martial Arts match?

    I'll get into the octagon alone against Don and both of his boys... shit, you can join then if you want Nick. If the four of you beat me, I'll never set foot in Buffalo again. In addition, you guys will get 15% of the betting action.

    If I win, no one in Buffalo would be in the least bit surprised.

    I'm guessing that I'm the only one among our peers who has actually killed another human being, so I'm guessing I'll do okay against the four of you by myself.

    Might be worth it... I bet half of Allentown would buy a ticket.

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  18. My point was that you were calling Don out but never stated whether or not you really owed him money. I reread your post twice and you never said one way or another if you really did. You are still justifying not paying him in the first place by saying you have receipts.

    You deleted a long post I made which is pretty low. I don't think I said anything out of line, I just questioned your arguments which seemed more personal then based in reality. Why don't you repost it so your readers can be the judge. Unless you would rather this space be filled with sycophantic comments to placate you.

    Just look at the other responses to this post. It's turned into Shit-on-Don-palooza. This is why I felt the need to defend him. Lord knows the man has his faults, but who among you doesn't? I'm sure no ones ever found you annoying Laura. I called you out but at least you have the decency to use a real name.

    For the record if I came across a blog somewhere that was calling you out for for a seemingly unjustifiable action, and then followed by a group of anonymous assholes pointing out your personal flaws, I'd confront the accuser in the same manner that I did here.

    -Nick

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  19. Did you just call me out to a fight and threaten to kill me because I questioned you on an internet blog?

    -Nick

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  20. aww...make nice now, boys. Lower the testosterone levels. Can't we all be friends?

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  21. Nick... I never threatened to kill you, although there are times I could have ended you, and no court would have convicted me.

    You know you live to push buttons. That's exactly what you're doing now.

    You also know damn well you wouldn't defend me with the vigor that you have risen to Don's defense here.

    Let me make it clear.

    I don't owe Don anything.

    Not dime one.

    In fact, he owes ME a fair chuck of change, but we had a "gentlemen's agreement" which I honored, and he shit on.

    While all this is going on, the man himself has stayed in the shadows, because that's what he does. He talks a good game, but when it's time to face the issue, he hides, waits in the tall grass, and attacks when he thinks there is no chance of retaliation. That's what happened last year when he actually tried to do an end-run around me by filing against me in a New York court while I was a resident of Minnesota.

    I remain an honorable man.

    But if you play dirty with me, I can get real dirty, real quick too.

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  22. @ Nick: You need to back off of this one. Don wasn't the victim in that situation, and has talked more than his fair share of shit about Jonathan.

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  23. My 2 cents

    I think all of you are making a big deal about nothing. What Don's old lady did was stupid and classless, so what. Can't Ms. ***** deal with it. It sounded like she did fine with a classless comment from a classless lady and Jonathan is the one taking it to a new level. Put everything in perspective she could've lost her life instead of sharing an elevator with the queen of the trailer park.

    Keep in mind I don't know anyone involved here and I live in Arizona so am not confined to a computer screen, due to the weather, but it sounds like a very minor thing.

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  24. Arizona reader:

    Yes, I escalated this thing to nuclear. However, I was NOT the one who decided to make it public. If you hit me with a stick, I will hit you with a BIGGER stick. I will protect those around me from ignorant, inappropriate behavior with the very core of my being.

    I do appreciate your commenting here however, especially since you don't know any of the parties involved, including me. Helps me put the whole situation in perspective. Thank you.

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  25. Jon,
    That is one of my all time favorite quotes...
    ANother one of my favorites is... People sleep peaceably in their bed at night only because rough men stand ready to do violence on their behalf..
    Stay safe,
    Mike M.

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